
ASSIGNMENTS:
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Ethel Megahertz
Amman, JORDAN
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REPORTS:
PREVIOUS NEXT
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Advice to Ethel Megahertz at age 22:
1.Quit that job at the Museum before you sign another six month lease you can't get out of. You feel like it's sucking the life from your body because that's exactly what this job is doing.
2.Break up with Cody before Christmas and spare yourself the agonies of gift-choosing and money-spending.
3.Go to yoga every day. It will make you strong and calm which lord knows is what you need more than anything else right now.
4.Don't buy that stupid yellow dress. Yellow is not a good color for you.
5.When you are in the middle of the coldest darkest month of the year and you can't imagine that you will ever be happy again and you feel that every breath you take is a secret agony and you stop eating because physical pain is more manageable than the pain of losing him, please please know that you will be ok again, soon even!
6.Carry condoms with you everywhere you go.
Advice to Ethel Megahertz at age 19:
1.Break up with Cody after the first time he cheats on you. He'll do it again and you don't have anything in common.
Advice to Ethel Megahertz at age 17:
1.Break up with Cody before you go to college. You both need time to grow and you don't have that much in common anyway.
Advice to Ethel Megahertz at age 15:
1.Don't have sex with Cody. It feels good but you both need time to grow and you don't have that much in common anyway.
2.If you're going to put Sun-In in your hair, don't tell people that you haven't. They can tell.
3.Don't use Nair on your face without testing it first. It will burn and you'll go to school with a fantastic mustache-shaped burn for a week.
4.Don't tell your father that you hate him before he goes to Iraq. For the rest of your life you will be sorry for the little cruelties you were so adept at meting out when he doesn't come back.
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