ASSIGNMENTS:
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MagBCos
Melbourne, AUSTRALIA
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REPORTS:
PREVIOUS NEXT
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Advice to me up until NOW:
* Age 6: Make a rule to your parents that they're not allowed to bitch about each other in your presence, it unfairly influences your opinion.
* Age 8: Stop and listen to the desperate hurt in your sister's screams of rage when you lock her out of the house while you and your friends are inside- let her in and treat her equal. She will hold it against you forever because she broke that window and cut up her hand when she smashed through it to get in and you will feel sad for the sensitive little psycho all your life.
* Age 12: Just do your school work and hand it in on time. Wrapping unfinished work in a plastic bag with raw eggs cracked on it and hiding it under the house wont make the due date go away, and will set you up for a lifetime of bad habits.
* Age 14: Why smoke pot now? Your brain hasn't even formed yet and you got your aunty into trouble with your Mum, because you stole the pot out of her drawer when she was living with you and she got kicked out as a result, at a time when she really needed us.
* Age 18: Don't go to Melbourne Uni. Get the hell out of town and go traveling. Otherwise you will just end up hanging out with a manic depressive high school friend for two years and spiral downwards.
* Age 20: Going west was a good move. But in the future, don't wait for a tragic death to get you moving. Spending a month making a garden is the best thing you did- definitely plant stuff when people you love die, especially plants they loved.
* Age 21: If you fall in love with someone, tell them before they get married and have kids. Revelation eases repression, even if it doesn't go your way.
* Don't EVER live in Thailand with a homophobic-gay-Catholic missionary covert-to-Judaism-spiritual-healer named Athol Bloomer.
* Age 22: Avoid falling in love with your dear friend's untalented, deadbeat boyfriend. He will have no place in your heart in the future and she will be your friend for life.
* Age 25: Avoid falling in love with a junkie. He will continue to make you smile when you think of his dopey swagger and loud voice but you will always call him C. Fucked (not Fox).
* Choose who you live with very carefully. Over-dominating women are a no-no. Angsty couples- walk away. Dutch performance artists are definitely out. The dog stays.
* Age 26: Put your education and skills to practice. You can't buy time in universities for the rest of your life.
* Age 27: Tell someone you love them, even if it feels over-dramatic and NQR. The repression cycle will always remain otherwise.
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