ASSIGNMENTS:
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Daidalos
Cleveland, Tennessee USA
Email Daidalos
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REPORTS:
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ADVICE TO DAIDALOS AT THE AGE OF SEVEN
1. One morning you will awake from a dream with a strong desire to play with a certain toy. After searching your father's truck, you will start to second guess yourself. "Was it just a dream? It felt so real, but where has it gone?" This happens sometimes with dreams. When you grow older it will be money and other things that don't concern you now instead, but don't be discouraged. The toy will find you, sixteen years later, tucked away in a box you won't find until it has been presented to you.
2. Late at night, you will awake very sick, and rush to the bathroom to throw-up. Don't use the toilet. Use the small trash can beside the toilet, because when you start to throw-up, you won't stop for quite some time -and be brave- you'll have to start pooping and that won't stop either and you'll be pressed for time and unsure of whether to put your face or your bottom in the toilet. Use you the bucket so you don't end up in the tub with your poop and throw-up. Don't be scared. Mom will hear you. Keep calling for her.
3. Don't laugh at jokes you don't hear just because everyone else is in the cafeteria. You'll shoot milk out your nose and get sent to the quite table.
4. Tell your mother she's doing a wonderful job.
5. When the babysitter takes you fishing, remind her that your mom is paying her to watch you- not to keep you locked up in a stuffy old truck for hours on end.
6. Your parents won't be disappointed in you if you tell them you want to take music lessons and learn to play instruments instead of baseball.
7. Be honest. Lies will get you in worse trouble than you already are. If it makes anyone mad or upset just remind them, you should be proud I told the truth.
8. When you dad yells at you for leaving you rubber boa constrictor in his pile of leaves, he will actually come to appreciate it in ways I still have not had the pleasure of experiencing. Just make sure not to smile until after he goes back into the yard. This is a time to laugh on the inside.
9. Grown-up church can be boring. Mom will let you play with your toy as long as you keep quiet. Just don't slide around on church pews or God will put a splinter in your bottom.
10. Don't go into the pastor's son's tent. Tell his mom and she'll let you play all the video games you want without doing her any favors.
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