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Advice to Aisha at age 5
1- Do not do so many drugs between the ages of 12-15. You won t remember that time afterwards anyway. And none of those people are really your friends. 20 year old men who hang out with teenagers are losers- irregardless of how hot they are and how much older you seem.
2- Stay focused on being great- do not let the overly pessimistic/realistic people around you convince you that you can t, that you are being vain, or that it is silly.
3- Go to university the minute you get out of high school. Your dad spending you trust fund (on alcohol probably) is not a sign that it isn t the path . Loans aren t as bad as they seem. Go very part time at first while you think about what you want.
4- Do not see your dad when he comes back when you are 12. It will just fuck up your life. Yes, it is great to have a dad, but not a dad who molests you. Best to skip that.
5- Do not phone nana from the hostel in Ireland. You get the hostel guy in trouble for letting you use the phone and she tells you M killed himself. When you find out know that it is not your fault. At all.
6- From 11 on- Despite your mother being schizophrenic you will not be- ever- it is fine- but you will worry yourself into feeling very scared and immobilized for a long time.
7- Under 11- Your mother is schizophrenic, yes it is hard, but don t listen to her when she is cruel. Try to move in with your grandparents- if you tell them that she hits you then you might not have to keep moving back in with her.
8- Don t be scared of your grandfather- it isn t true and you will never really be close again.
9- Take school seriously. Getting all a s is good, but you can do even better- no, the world doesn t end with a b- but straight high 90 s might help you with funding.
10- Don t try to be so perfect. It is fine; you can t fix your life that way. But you will get an ulcer young. Don t be so scared of not being perfect- it will stop you from doing things you want to do. Everybody fucks up sometimes.
11- Don t sleep with M.
12- Don t move in with J. It is a waste of time.
13- Take is very slow with E and be honest with him, tell him how you feel- he feels the same way and you will both be happier if he knows it. But don t get involved with him until he can deal with the age difference.
14. The world is not full of infinite opportunities. It is not as easy as that. Use the ones you get, later you will realize how good they are- write for that magazine- at least once- use all the scholarship $- work really really hard and try to sell at L.
15- You are a better person than you realize. Imperfections are normal and good.
16- You are also much more attractive that you realize, don t become anorexic or bulimic, don t worry. Just try to sleep more, exercise normally, eat normally and treasure yourself, start wearing sunscreen super young- really high. Soon you will realize that you tortured yourself for nothing.
17- Don t be so freaked out about trust.
18. Tell people right away when you are molested. Stop keeping secrets. It makes sex hard later because you are scared of people but don t realize why for, well, ridiculously long. Tell people about mom. Tell people everything.
19- Do not go long-jumping that day. Take very very very good care of your knees. Do lots of knee exercises. If you have that first knee injury, do not take PE that next year, you will hurt it again. Get an MRI, it is more fucked up than anybody realizes.
20. Take very good care of your wrists. Never, ever hammer texture stuff- be very careful.
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